In a piece for Glamour, Stephen Colbert respects women:

I love women. I’m married to one, I was birthed by one, and I played one in my high school production of Romeo and Juliet. No one else could fit into the bodice.

Women today have so many smart, resourceful, and intuitive role models. Look no further than Marissa Mayer, Michelle Obama, Sacajawea, and the green M&M.

And according to the U.S. Census Bureau, women outnumber men. Fellas, technically this does make you a minority, but it’s probably best not to say so on your college financial aid application.

It has been pointed out to me that I, like other late-night TV hosts, am a man. And while I’m happy to have a job, I am surprised that the world of late-night TV lacks a female presence, unlike sitcoms, which are packed with smoking-hot wives who teach their doughy husband a valuable lesson when he slips on a pizza and falls headfirst into a porta-potty full of beer. Check your local listings.

Read Colbert’s full piece here.