You know the expression “Never say never”? Here’s a starter list of phrases that will never be used to describe me:
- He enjoyed being surrounded by large crowds of drunken people.
- He loved every second of every “Sharknado” movie.
- He was one of the world’s greatest soccer enthusiasts.
- He was an early adapter of many Microsoft hardware products, particularly The Zune.
- He never missed a moment of the Monday 8am physics lab in his freshman year of college.
- He couldn’t get enough of debates about how to achieve peace in the Middle East.
- He enjoyed working on actuarial tables in his free time.
- He once got stuck on a roller coaster that stopped in the middle of a ride.
- He yearned to spend more time in the deep south.
- He once considered a career as a clergyman.