Seeing Harris and Pence sitting behind plexiglass 12 feet apart made me think I’d come upon a heads-up hold’em game on Poker Go.

Nothing about last night’s debate between will change the mind of a single voter — although the fly that landed on Pence’s head has taken a nine-point lead over Lindsay Graham in South Carolina.

The fly now has to quarantine for 14 days, which sucks because its entire lifespan is only 28 days.

Kudos to whoever on Biden’s team acted quickly and locked up the domain, which redirects to

Sometimes, you gotta love the Twitterverse, where someone immediately opened an account for The Fly In Mike Pence’s Hair. First tweet: “Hi, everybody! I’m on TV!!”

The best tweet of the night on this subject was from Randy Rainbow: “I think we can all agree the winner of tonight’s #VPDebate was Jeff Goldblum.”

Pence gave evangelicals the obligatory shoutout by reminding them Trump moved the US embassy in Israel to Jerusalem. You may not think that’s a big deal but, for swing voters, it is the 1,873,265th most important issue in this election! Just ahead of “My gum loses its flavor too quickly.”

Moderator Susan Page did a terrible job, particularly in getting Pence to stick to the time limits, which he bulldozed through repeatedly (no doubt at Trump’s direction). He also couldn’t resist interrupting Harris, which will not help attract women, a demographic the GOPers are losing by quite a bit.

Page let Pence get away without directly replying to questions, a missed opportunity for her to follow up and press the same inquiries until he answered them.

Page’s last question was truly lame, a query from a Utah college student about how to bring the country together again. That’s such a softball even former beauty pageant candidates thought, “That’s an easier question than they ask us!”

During a question about racism and the need for police reform, I decided I have changed my mind about choke holds. From now on, they should be applied on debate stages whenever a participant keeps going over time and interrupting their opponent.

Speaking of the short segment devoted to racism, after Harris gave her answer, I wish Page had said, “Now, here to talk about this topic is the whitest human who ever lived not named Johnny Winter.”