At the poker table the other night, two of the players were going around the table and betting on each player’s age. Whoever was closest won, with the “Price Is Right” proviso that any guess over the correct answer wouldn’t count.

When they got to me, one guy guessed 64. The other frowned as if that was way too high, so he guessed 57. When I told them I’m 66, the loser replied, “Sixty-six? You look great!”

He surely meant this as a compliment, but it’s not. Both of these guys were around half my age, so they didn’t know that “you look great” is a backhanded way of saying, “Wow, at your age, I thought you’d look more decrepit,” with “more” being the key word in that phrase.

For the record, I’m fully aware of how I look and would never assess my own appearance as “great.”

Guys their age never say “you look great” to their male peers. I’d hope they’d be smart enough in the #MeToo era to know it’s risky to say it to a female co-worker, as well. But they might say it to a woman they’re going on a date with as a comment on their entire look.

Whereas a man my age might say it to their wife because he knows there’s a chance the outfit being worn could be a recently-purchased wardrobe addition (we have no idea what’s in our wives’ closets) and it’s his way of saying, “Excellent choice!” There’s also a chance that they were supposed to leave twenty minutes ago, and the husband giving a simple verbal thumbs-up at this point could get them out the door sooner.

Then there’s the aspect of “you look great” that is an out-and-out lie. This occurs when you run into someone who is at least a couple of decades older and you haven’t seen in quite some time. Inside your head, you’re thinking, “Oh, wow, the years have not been kind to you.” But you know you can’t say that out loud, so instead you go for the cheap and charitable “you look great!”

In most instances, the recipient of the remark accepts the lie nonetheless and appreciates your effort and the ego boost — but is usually smart enough to know they don’t look great because they own a mirror.

They’re also old enough to know that at their funeral, when they’re laid out in an open coffin, plenty of people will take a look and say, “Doesn’t she look great?”